Lions on Facebook

For some reason, my Facebook feed gives me lots of short films of lions in national parks. I watch them, so I suppose the algorithm (or Zuckerberg sitting by his computer checking it) decides to give me even more short films of lions. So I watch even more films of lions.

So one thought about lions: they really can't be arsed, can they? They spend most of the time yawning, sitting about, getting up very slowly, moving a yard or two and sitting down again, or just looking. They do hours and hours of looking. The horizon seems to be very interesting for them. 'Yeah, man, great horizon today.' 'Yeah, it's even further than I thought it was.'

'We're not going there, are we?'

'Hell, no. No way.'

'That's what I thought.'

'Stay here?'

‘Sure.'

They sometimes walk into the middle of the road and sit down and stare at cars. The cubs are lively. In fact they're so lively they really irritate the parents who are just trying to rest so the parents give them a clout to quieten them down. Sometimes the cubs get lost in the long grass but the parents don't run about looking for them. They stroll around. Very slowly. And then sit down.

I saw one bit of film where some lions decided to eat a hippo. The other hippos seemed a bit bothered about this and got close up. The lions didn't do very much. They just stood up and glared. That was enough. The hippos cleared off, leaving the lions to carry on eating their friend. So the glaring worked.

Every now and then they run at a buffalo, but even then one or two of them stand around while the others do the work. Then when they get to eat the buffalo, some of them just sink their teeth into it and wait for the buffalo meat to do the work.

I don't know how they get away with it. I'm surprised government ministers haven't spotted these layabouts and withdrawn their benefits.